Lord, it's hard to be Catholic

Every day I find myself defending the faith I was born into. Why it is others make fun of what they don’t know? They say love is a battlefield and it is true, my love for the church and my faith is always under fire. Most of the time I know it is meant jokingly, but other times it feels hurtful and no matter what I say, it gets rebuked - it often is futile to even try. Today I found myself set up for admonishment for my preference to date men of the same faith – that is my choice as much as it is my choice to eat chicken instead of fish. I listened to what they said, I was limiting my choices, being close minded – I didn’t say much, which led to further abashment on another trivial unrelated matter. I recalled when Jesus was called before Pilot and was asked if he was the King of the Jews. Jesus remained silent until he offered one reply “It is you who say I am”. Then Jesus was flogged and crucified. The hurt I feel is miniscule to what Jesus went through and I cannot even fathom how he must have felt. I offered it up, dried my eyes and carried on with my tasks, not speaking for the entire day at work. It seems people in other denominations including lapsed Catholics find it hard to understand why we stand by the church even as she undergoes hardships and trial with the clergy abuse scandals, attacks on doctrines and catechisms. I believe they use these as barriers in their own faith journeys…and use them for verbal attacks on the faithful. Or maybe they are just looking for someone who can give them the answers. I can’t give them the answers they look for because I search for them as well but I do it with faith, trust and hope in God.